In May I attended my aunt’s graduation from Smith College. The keynote speaker was Ai Jen Poo, a feminist and domestic workers advocate. She addressed the graduates and asked this, in reference to women taking powerful positions: “do you want to change things or run them?”
It’s a simple question, but I think it really gets to the heart of how we develop and pursue our goals… How you are and what you accomplish in the world changes depending on whether your aim is to have influence or to be in power (i.e. do you want to change things or run them).
Motivation
If your ultimate goal is to be “in power”, then you’ll probably do whatever it takes to get yourself to the top. According to the 48 Laws of Power, a best-selling albeit controversial book about how power is cultivated, some tactics include “use absence to increase respect and honor”, “learn to keep people dependent on you”, and “never put too much trust in friends.”
However, if your goal is to inspire positive change, you’ll collaborate with others who can help make it happen. See How to Win Friends and Influence People. In this monumental work, first published in 1936 (and named by Time magazine as one of the 100 Most Influential Books 75 years later), Dale Carnegie advises tactics such as “Make the other person feel important – and do it sincerely,” “Try honestly to see things from the other person’s point of view,” and “Ask questions instead of giving direct orders.”
Manifestations
As one might expect, there are stark differences between people who are pursuing power and those who are pursuing change. When people are striving for and achieving positions of power it looks like taking credit, being right, and blaming others when things don’t work out. It manifests as loneliness, stress, and often high turnover in their companies.
When people aim to influence others they are usually more humble (seeking feedback), more empathetic, more inquisitive, and more willing to fail. As a result they feel more connected to others, smile more, and inspire creativity, courage, and collaboration. They also tend to be more successful. In Jim C Collins’ book, Good to Great, he identifies “Level 5 Leadership” as something all of the Great companies have in common. These Level 5 leaders “attend to people first” and manifest humility by “crediting others, external factors, and good luck for their companies’ success but, blame themselves [when results are poor],” …and their companies persevere when others fail.
Success
I’d argue that influence is much more desirable than power, and the not-so-coincidental truth is that influence has a much greater impact than power. In the Forbes article, Power Vs. Influence: Knowing The Difference Could Make Or Break Your Company, Kuhel quotes Rabbi Lord Jonathan Sacks on the subject: “Power is a zero-sum game…the more we give away, the less we have.” Whereas, “if you have influence and share it with nine people, you increase your influence nine-fold.”
So what will it be? Do you want to change things or run them?